Happy Birthday Daddy!

Because her father listened to her, she knew she had something to say.
Because he believed in her, she believed in herself.
Because he said she could do anything, she did.

Happy 50th Birthday Daddy! I love you!

Closer to 30 Than 20

It's official - I'm closer to 30 than I am to 20. I feel all grown up :-)

My birthday was Wednesday, and I turned 26. It was a perfectly perfect day! I always take off on my birthday (which Josh thinks is ridiculous, just for the record - haha) and this year I convinced hubby to take off with me. He got up bright and early to go get breakfast, and brought back this:


He did have a lunch meeting that he couldn't miss - it was with the mayor, so I didn't complain about it too much - and that gave me and my mommy some time together to hang out. She took me out to lunch, and then we went shopping at the local Christian bookstore for awhile. She got me a Francine Rivers book that I've really been wanting to read, Redeeming Love. It's a story based on Hosea, and I'm super excited to get started on it!!!

After supper, Josh pulled out a cake from my favorite bakery, with beautiful daisies all over it! Daisies are such happy flowers, and my absolute favorite! What a lucky gal I am to have such a sweetheart adoring me!


So, of course on my birthday, I thought about goals for this year, and I bet you can guess which one landed on top...a little Lynch!! When my mom and I were shopping I came across a line of baby clothes called "His GEM". They are adorable and all have little Bible verses attached somehow. She let me spend a good little while looking at everything in the baby section, but I kept going back to the clothes, and picking them up, and touching them, and imagining how sweet my little one would be in them. We left, but when I got home my heart was a little bit achy. So this morning, I decided to make a little purchase of faith. I went back to the store and bought a bib that I absolutely love! Why not? Even if I'm not pregnant yet, I believe this will be our year - I can just feel it!!

Here is the front. It's hard to see in the picture but it says "His Little Lamb":


Here is the back:


I'm so thankful for another marvelous year with many warm and wonderful memories!

It's About That Time!

Fall is soooo my favorite season of the year! I love the fall colors, all the smells of fall (damp leaves, fires, cinnamon), swapping t-shirts and flip-flops for warm, fuzzy sweaters and boots, starting the fireplace inside, and Starbucks Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate!! Most of all though – fall means it’s time to start preparing for CHRISTMAS!!! Oh yes, I’ve already started! I’m particularly excited about this year’s holiday season! For the first time in the last 5 years, I have the entire week of Christmas off. And now that Josh is working for himself, there is a good possibility that I can spend most of that with him. It will be so nice to make it to Christmas in one piece, with no added stress of baking at 4AM for the next day’s meals. I’ve already started our Christmas shopping and wrapping, I’ve purchased our Christmas cards (thank you Target for putting out your Christmas stuff way earlier than you should) and I’m starting to put together food lists for all of our get-togethers.

I’ve discovered over the years, that when I wait until the last minute to do shopping/wrapping/baking/decorating, I get so stressed out that I forget to celebrate the true meaning of Christmas. To do everything last minute also really makes it difficult for the poor people working in retail. I have plenty of friends who, at some point, have worked retail over Christmas, and they hate, hate, hate it. During a time of the year when people should be especially cheerful, they are instead fighting over stupid toys that will be thrown into a toy box and forgotten about in two weeks time.

I’m determined to not be a terrible consumer this year. I’m also determined to make it a priority to help someone else this Christmas. In the past, Josh and I have been guilty of not helping perhaps as much as we should, because we were so busy with last minute preparations. This year, I hope that my advance preparations will give me some time to volunteer at a shelter, or to purchase a few extra toys for a needy family, or even to maybe cook a special dinner for someone who doesn’t have any family around. So if you think about it – it really isn’t too early to start planning. If we all procrastinated a little bit less, just think of how many more people we could bless with our generosity at a time of the year when generosity is too often overlooked!

Try It Tuesday - Mrs.Myers Laundry Detergent

Ever since Josh and I have been married, we have had quite a dilemma with laundry detergent. You see, my sweet husband has very sensitive skin, and it seems like ALL laundry detergents with any kind of scent irritate his skin. We have tried every version of "Free and Clear" out there, and while they are just as effective, they just haven't been my favorite. Why? Because I love nothing more than smelly laundry soap (picture snuggling up to a warm, fluffy towel that has a lingering scent of lavender...) Of course that towel fantasy of mine has been non-existent - until now. Recently I was in Whole Foods wandering up and down the aisles, and I realized I needed laundry detergent. They happened to have Mrs.Myers on sale, and although there were many heavenly scents (think basil, lemon, lavender), I figured since it was "natural", I would give it a shot, despite Josh's normal reaction to anything smelly.

I. Am. Addicted.

Oh yes. So here's what is so great about it.
-There are about 12 ingredients in each bottle, all of which are completely natural. No harmful chemicals, or dyes, and completely free of ammonia, chlorine or phosphates.
-The scent actually comes from essential oils - so it's not a fake smell. It's fresh, but vague when the clothes are dry. While they are washing, my house smells like heaven.
-They are a very environmentally friendly company and try to use plant derived ingredients any way they can.
-They get our smelly clothes CLEAN! Really, really clean.
-Josh has had NO reaction at all (WOO HOO!)
-They are very inexpensive. Comparable to my previous detergent.

I am confident that if I love the detergent this much, all of their other products are probably great, too! I can't wait to start trying more!

Try It Tuesday - Finding the Blessings

I’ve decided to start a new series – “Try It Tuesday”. Every Tuesday, I’ll write about something that I think you should try. It may be a book, or a recipe, or a product, or even a concept. But whatever it is, you can rest assured that Josh and I have both tried it and think it’s awesome enough to write about.

So today, I’d like to challenge you to find the blessings in whatever hardship you are facing in your personal life. This one seems SO very obvious, and doesn’t seem like something that you would even need to be reminded of, right? WRONG. I think that we could all use a little refresher on finding that illusive silver lining.

As most of you know by now, Josh and I have been struggling with infertility for a little over 3 years now. It’s hard to even explain that type of emotional roller coaster with someone who hasn’t been there, but I can tell you that the emotions I’ve personally experienced have been similar to the emotions in the classic model of grief (if you’ve ever taken any type of psychology class, you’ve probably studied it, too) It’s typically used to describe the emotions of someone who has found out he is dying, or someone who has just lost a close someone. That’s why it surprised me, looking back, that I went through all of them in a text book fashion.

The denial phase for me lasted about six months. I totally ignored the fact that the doctor said I would have trouble getting pregnant, and sailed blissfully through each month waiting on a positive test. When it didn’t happen, I hit the anger phase. I was soooo mad at my body for not working right, and often mad at God for not doing anything about it (this is in my time – I’ll touch back on this one in a bit). Then the classic bargaining stage started, and I promised everything I could think of if I could just get pregnant. The depression phase for me was the longest, and it is when I started my original blog here. It wasn’t until I hit the acceptance phase, probably six months ago, that everything cleared up, and I began to see a glimmer of the silver lining. The “acceptance” wasn’t that I was infertile, but was a realization that God was in control of my body and my life, and that in His time, not mine, we would conceive. How can I be so sure?

“Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust in Him and He will do this... Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him…” (Psalm 37: 5-7)

I think many people use that verse out of context and think that whatever you want, you should get. But that isn’t the case at all. By delighting yourself in the Lord, you are striving to be more like Him, and ultimately, His desires for you become your desires for you. My entire life I feel like I have had a calling to be a mother. I’ve longed so badly for a child that at certain points I thought my heart would physically break in two. So I believe, wholeheartedly, that I will be a mother. Whether it is through a natural conception, an assisted conception, or adoption, we will complete our family with the addition of children. We stand strong in our belief that God is able to do FAR more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think (Ephesians 3:20)

When we originally joined the “infertility club”, I couldn’t see beyond the moment. I was so focused on getting pregnant, that I merely existed. I didn’t appreciate the present, and I floated through the days imagining what life would be like with a baby. Now I can clearly see some resulting blessings that have come from this trial.

Josh’s business – If we had conceived when we originally started trying, Josh wouldn’t have been able to quit the predictability of his Sanford job as soon as he did. In fact, it may have been years down the road. He is now working in his dream job and has unlimited potential for growth. We have been so very thankful for this wonderful opportunity every step of the way!

Time together – We have had so much time to hang out and just be in love. The years that we have spent together have been priceless. We know that life changes when children come. That’s not a bad thing, but long gone are they days of lounging around in our pajamas all day and snuggling up to movies. It’s fun to still be able to do those things now. About a year and a half ago, on a particularly awful day, Josh sent me a text that said, "I wanna have a baby. But I want you to know that I wouldn’t trade the time we have had for anything in the world. You are what makes me complete. A baby is bonus." I love that he adores me more with each passing day.

Godly wisdom – SO many women have provided their prayers and support for us, and have provided insight and wisdom that has proved invaluable. Through this journey, I’ve learned quite a lesson on patience, and I’ve learned through the stories of these women that there is hope, and that no matter how I feel sometimes, we’ve not been forgotten about.

Forgiveness – This is perhaps the most important blessing that has come about recently. Five to six years ago, a situation happened with someone that I loved and trusted very much. My trust in her was completely shattered, my feelings were hurt, and I had a really hard time forgiving her. Over the last five years, I’ve reflected on the things that happened over that year frequently, and every time I thought about it, I could feel myself grow angry. I have often prayed about how to forgive, but just never could. She started struggling with infertility, and I had such a strong desire to share with her some of the wisdom that had been passed along to me – there was finally a common ground! Our friendship has blossomed again, and I’ve discovered a very different woman than the one who originally caused all of my hurt. Just as Josh and I have matured, so has she, but because of the bitterness I was harboring, I never allowed myself to see that until now. I look forward to her e-mails, and we’ve really been able to encourage each other along the way. Last week I thought about all of the things that happened so long ago, and I didn’t grow angry or upset at all. I remembered, but I was unaffected. That’s when I realized I had finally been able to find that forgiveness I have been looking for. A bad situation was definitely used for something good!

So as you can see, even when it feels like your world is over (I’ve felt that way often!!) it’s important to step back, and see the good. So again, on this Tuesday, I would challenge you to do the same. I pinky promise, if you manage to see the blessings, "life" doesn't seem quite so overwhelming.

MIA!!

So Josh and I have been MIA for an entire month! My apologies - life got in the way! I decided that I could easily handle two condensed summer courses and work, but I didn't anticipate the surgery week. I wasn't feeling good the entire week after surgery, and I was taking pain pills every few hours so I certainly wasn't able to devote 100% to school. Unfortunately, in a summer course one week is ALOT of work. My teachers were super understanding, but it seemed like it was just impossible to get caught up after the break. I was literally up until at least midnight every single night until a couple weeks ago. I'm an eight hour a night gal, so that does not make for a chipper Kristen!

To update you on the knee - all is great! I had my final post op appointment yesterday, and the doctor was very pleased with my progress. I've been in physical therapy every week, and we are finally at the stage where I feel comfortable moving a bit more quickly. I'm not running quite yet, and it's still pretty painful moving up stairs, but the doctor said it would probably be at least another eight weeks before I was completely pain free. Because of all the extra work he had to do, he said this is normal. I thought I would share a couple of battlescars from the surgery.



That's a few days after surgery. The left side of my knee in the picture is where the stitches are. I had two on each side of the big, purple line. So the scars are tiny, only about a half inch for each of them.



THAT IV HURT!

In other news, Josh changed offices with MidSouth Satellite/Definition. They outgrew their old office, and found a new one that is more than double the size, and a much better location. The guys have really been very blessed as far as business is concerned. They seem to keep growing, growing, growing! It was really a big leap of faith for Josh to quit his full time, predictable job with Sanford and go to his own business - especially since he made almost double my income. Although we had prayed about it, I was still not fond of the idea. I'm glad I didn't fight back too hard, because even though Josh is working more hours, he is so much happier doing his own thing. I'm so proud of the good business decisions that he has made, and so thankful that I have a husband who is both honest and fair in the way he operates a business that represents our family. Thank you Lord for providing!

Surgery Update

So I had to have knee surgery yesterday. Yeah, no fun at all. About ten years ago I had a sports accident and tore "The Terrible Triad" - my ACL, MCL, and meniscus cartilage. I had to have a full reconstructive surgery then, and I honestly thought that would be the last time that I would have any knee issues. Wrong. Back in December I noticed some pain in my knee, and some locking of it fairly regularly. I had an MRI, and while my ACL/MCL are holding up just fine, I did manage to do some damage to my meniscus again. The doctor thinks that it never really healed from the first operation, and that's why it tore so easily. He described it like a pillowcase. If you just try to tear a pillowcase it is really, really difficult, but if you start off with a small tear, then it doesn't take much effort to pull it apart even further.

I was SO nervous before surgery - kindof giggling uncontrollably (that's typically how I deal with nervousness, haha) After they got me into my gown and got my IV in, they let Josh come and sit with me, which helped me calm down a little. Then Dr.Thomas came in. He could tell I was uneasy, and so he started kindof rubbing my forehead, and then he put his hand over Josh's and said, "Let's pray". I was SO amazed. I didn't expect that at all, but he prayed this marvelous prayer. He asked that God would keep me safe from any complications, and asked that God would guide his hands, and was just very sincere. I heart him. I think I'll definitely be sending a card and maybe some goodies to his office.

So the plan was, that during the surgery he was just going to trim out the cartilage that was torn, and I would be back at work on Monday. No such luck. Once he got in, he realized that I had excessive scar tissue from the original surgery that had pushed my knee cap out of alignment, so he decided to clean all of that out. Because of all the extra work, he told me that he wants me out of work for at least a week, and also that I'll have to do 4-6 weeks of physical therapy. I am NOT excited about that; hopefully this will be the last time I have any issues though. As soon as we got into the car, I just kept saying over and over, "I have to call Beth, I have to call Beth" (Beth is my boss) and I think Josh was trying to talk me out of it because I was still ridiculously groggy from the anethesia, but I called her anyway. I just feel terrible about work. I didn't anticipate missing, and I hate having to leave everyone to do my work with no notice at all, ya know? But I really didn't have much of a choice. In order to miss, I guess I have to call Metlife and file a claim, and I have no idea how that works because I've never had any kind of claim before. This should be fun.

For now, I'm permanantly parked on the couch (sleeping here, too) and stuck in an immobilizer that goes from my ankle to the very top of my leg. I can't take a shower yet, so Josh helped me wash my hair this morning. He's also been doing a marvelous job at feeding me and making sure my knee gets iced every half hour. I'm a pretty lucky gal ;-)

I'm sure I'll be posting some pictures of the knee a little later, maybe even tomorrow. I'll keep everyone updated though, promise.